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Expectant Mother on Bed Rest

We have a baby shower planned for a mother who just went on bed rest. We have offered to re-schedule the shower, or to move the shower to her home, but she would rather that we just have the shower without her. She needs the gifts so does not want to postpone until the babies (twins) are born.

Is it ok to have without her?

If it is, do we open the gifts for her so that everyone at the shower can see what she got?

Thanks.

Our Answer:

Hi there,

What a bummer! Twins do carry a higher risk than normally so bed rest is more likely. If you decide to have the shower without her you will need to notify the guests of the situation. If you don't, they will be upset to find out that they went through all of the trouble of getting the gift and showing up without being told the mom to be would not be attending.

The whole excitement part of the baby shower is seeing the mom-to-be pregnant! If you do hold the shower without her, I think an interactive baby shower would be best. If the guests cannot be with the mom to be, they should at least be able to see her. So here are a few additional ideas that would still keep the guests happy and entertained, provided the mom to be goes along with it.

1.Do a live cam at both locations. Set it up so the guests can see the mom and the mom can see the guests. They can enjoy food, play games and speak with the mom to be during the shower. Then you can open gifts in front of the camera for the mom to see so guests get to enjoy her surprise as each gift is opened.

1.Tape the baby shower for her. Tape her thanking the guests for coming to the party. Play a few games with her on camera for the guests to watch at the shower. Then during the shower you can tape the guests. They can give her personal messages on the video and open each gift for her to see. You can get creative for this so it will be enjoyed later.
(You could also do an activity for this. Like have the guests decorate onesies, make scrapbook pages for her, or make diaper cakes for her to enjoy later.)

3.Start the shower at your location and end at hers. If she is agreeable to this the guests will get the enjoyment of being able to see her in person. Start the baby shower at your location. Play a few games and let the guests eat. Then everyone will carpool over to her location. Set a time limit at the end of the shower, make sure it is not very long so she is not strained during the bed rest. Maybe 10-15 minutes for the guests to visit with her. You will need to be respectful of the bed rest so make sure people are not hanging around too long so she can get back to resting.

Those are just a few ideas that will help the guests feel like the shower was worth their efforts. If the mom to be insists on having the shower without her and does not want to do any of the above options, you will just have to let the guests know her wishes and hope for the best turn out.

Good luck with planning the shower!

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